Monday, April 6, 2015

Like the Dawn



"Moses said God knew Adam was lonely...but he did not create Eve directly after He stated Adam was lonely. This struck me as funny, because a lot of times when I think about life before the fall, I don't think of people going around being lonely. But the thought also comforted me, because I realized loneliness in my own life doesn't mean I am a screw up, rather that God made me this way...when God saw this, He did not create Eve immediately. He did not give Adam what he needed right away. He waited. He told Adam to name the animals... And then I thought how beautiful it was that God made Adam work for so long because there is no way. after a hundred years of being alone, looking for somebody whom you could connect with in your soul, that you would take advantage of a woman once you met one. She would be the most precious creation in all the world, and you would probably wake up every morning and look at her and wonder..." 

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Stars, Setbacks, and Staying

    This week, I have been away from Memphis. My home. My city I love. My "Choose 901, Eat Local, look-at-all-the-culture-and-good-things-happening city.

    I have been away from Memphis, and after what has happened in the past few days, part of me wants to stay away.

     Dealing with the broken things in the world is hard. It makes you tired. Realizing that the incidents that took place this week took place at "my" Kroger, and "my" Target, where I shop all the time, is scary. Part of me is tired of being scared. I'm tired of having to look over my shoulder as I walk from my car. I'm tired of worrying about if it is ok for me to go somewhere alone at night. I'm tired of being hit on and asked for money by strangers on the street.

      I tend to criticize people who run away from the 'big bad city', especially people who call themselves Christians.  But this week I understood them a little better. Part of me has wanted to run away - to somewhere with fewer problems, less racial conflict, less litter, less homeless people, less drama, less theft, fewer gangs, less corruption, less of this senseless violence. To somewhere less "hard".

And then I was listening to this, and scrolling my Facebook feed, and I remembered why this city has my heart,  and why I stayed:


'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars
I wanna die in your arms

'Cause you get lighter the more it gets dark

I'm gonna give you my heart

I don't care, go on and tear me apart
I don't care if you do, ooh
'Cause in a sky, 'cause in a sky full of stars
I think I see you
I think I see you

'Cause you're a sky, you're a sky full of stars
Such a heavenly view
You're such a heavenly view



     I like to describe Memphis as a place that will "break your heart, and make you believe in miracles in the same day. Sometimes several times a day," and in this case that is definitely true. You seen, a group of Memphians came together and had a "Love Mob Memphis" on the corner of the shopping center where the Kroger incident took place. (Don't believe me? Go here: https://www.facebook.com/events/923797057634570/)  The purpose? To promote peace, love, and understanding in the city. To show that what happened there is not what this city is about. And it reminded me of all the good things in this city that I love - of the food, the art, the music, the parks, and mostly, the amazing people that I have gotten to know by living here. Things that I would have missed, or that wouldn't exist, if everyone just decided that Memphis was 'too hard'. (I'm looking at you, Levitt Shell, Overton Park, Muddy's Bake Shop, Broad Ave Arts District, Cooper Young, Overton Square, Beale Street, Metals Museum, Pink Palace, Lichterman Nature Center, Shelby Farms, Dixon Gallery and Gardens, Memphis Zoo, Cafe Eclectic, U of M, CBU, Rhodes, and MCA!!) 

And then my mind jumped here: 

"Thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: 5 Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce....multiply there, and do not decrease....seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf....For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord....to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:4-7,11

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.3 Consider him who endured such opposition... so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:1-3

"A new command I give to you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you are to love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:35

"19 We love because he first loved us. 20 Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. 21 And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister." 1 John 4:19-21 

"You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:14-16

     Whether you you are a Christian or not, please don't give up on Memphis. This city is made up of people like you, who see what it could be, and are fighting for it. You are making a difference by not running away. You matter to Memphis. Don't be discouraged. There are things wrong with Memphis, as the media regularly lets us know, but there is also SO MUCH right here. This is truly a "bootstrap city". This is a city that re-imagines long abandoned buildings, and saves them. (I'm looking at you, Crosstown Arts, Broad Avenue, and TN Brewery Untapped) This is a city that inspired a thousand songs. The city that throws an awesome combination week of music festival and fabulous cookout every year DESPITE the rain, snow, or whatever. Keep on rising. Keep on fighting. Keep on changing the world one day at a time, because you are ALL HEART, GRIT. GRIND. 

I love you, Memphis. 



Want more good Memphis vibes? Check out choose901.com and ilovememphisblog.com, and this guys neat videos - http://vimeo.com/jasonallenlee

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Sanctification, Community, and Cello

     Part of the reason I love art (including visual art, music, theatre, literature, and dance) is that it allows me to see things about God that I miss otherwise. It snaps me out of my busy to do list, grabs my attention, and makes me look.

     This morning as I was straightening my hair and getting ready for another long day of work, I was mulling over a discussion I had with a friend yesterday about why we need to be in community. As I was thinking about it (and trying not to singe off all my hair while I waited for my coffee to kick in) this song began to play on my Pandora station:


    And as the cellos began to join together, all our bits of conversation and musings began to come   together into a (slightly) more succinct (though not new) thought. Here it is:

"      Our lives lived under our authority are like a violin in the hands of a small child. It may technically 'work', but it doesn't work in the way it was meant to. The instrument doesn't meet its full potential, because the person playing it doesn't know the intricacies of it, or how to make it play songs they cannot even comprehend. Our lives, without being introduced to theory, practice, and discipline, cannot "make music" in the way that they were intended to. But our lives in submission to the teaching of the Master, who not only knows the theory that makes things beautiful, but also wrote it, allows our songs to become things of great beauty, complexity, and joy. The discipline allows the creativity. Rather than being hindered by all the things we don't know, understand, or care about, we begin to see more through the practice of following God's way over our own.  It isn't always easy, and the songs don't immediately sound great, but the process (the sanctification) of slowly learning what it means to love God and become more like Him allows us to see the beauty of life in the way we could not otherwise even imagine. We all learn at different stages and in different ways. But God brings one learner to another. We are not soloists, but an orchestra. All of our songs and stories, tangled together, no two the same, end up being directed into something far more complex and beautiful than we can ever achieve on our own. God teaches us and sanctifies us as individuals, but we are meant to learn and play communally, under his direction. 

     Additionally, not every person is a violin, or a cello. All the parts have to play together, and what they are playing is different, but complimentary, to enrich the sound. While living in community and dealing with people who are different from you is messy and uncomfortable, an orchestra of many instruments is far more beautiful than every person playing the same instrument the same way at the same time. "

    This is important for me to remember, because I know I tend to assume that I know what is best, and that everyone else should think and operate in the same way I do. But the older I get, the more I begin to understand the limits of my own wisdom, and appreciate the community that checks, corrects, and encourages me. I have loved getting to know more of the 'music' of the people in my Church through working with the youth, their parents, and the Church staff, as well as through hearing different peoples testimonies as a part of "Stories of Summer". God gives us community as a gift, but also as a command. We need it, and He knows it.

     Some people are drawn to the Gospel by reason, others by tradition, and others by doctrine. For me,  the draw will always be the beauty and the glory.

Monday, April 7, 2014

Thoughts from the Mountain


At the base of Elk Mountain

                         
"Thank you God for NOT giving me what I thought I wanted." 

     I find myself praying this more and more often all the time. And I came to realize it even further this weekend while I was hiking in the Wichita Mountains at the Wichita Natl Wildlife Refuge.

     When we arrived in the area of the mountains, it was amazing to see how they rushed up from the grassy plains. The reddish orange against the green scrubby bushes and the brilliant blue skies was a sight to behold. We could have stayed at the foot of the mountains, and enjoyed their beauty from there, but we wanted to climb.

     As we began to go up the trail, I kept being fascinated by the colors, the rocks, and the views. "Look how pretty it is!" I would say, over and over. My companion nodded, and agreed, but was eager to keep going. I kept wanting to stop. I might have even tarried there so long as to lose the sunlight and not make it to the top. But he was eager to get to the summit. As we progressed, I kept being more and more amazed by what we could see. When we reached the top, I was so thankful that we had pressed on. The view was stunning, more than I could have imagined when we we halfway up.

                            






      As we climbed down, I began to think about how God must see our lives like that. He knows what is at the top, what our life looks like from above. Sometimes, when we are too comfortable, or too content to stay only a quarter of the way up the mountain, He prods us on. Sometimes if we are resistant, He pushes us. This can seem very unfair. "I was perfectly happy looking at those flowers at the base! How could you take this away from me? You must not care about me God!" We cry as we asend. The climb can be hard. Our legs ache as our hearts are heavy. We reach a level spot in life, and say "This is as good as it gets!" and then he pushes us on further still. But once we reach the top, we see why He couldn't let us stay down below. He loves us too much to leave us to our own devices and distractions. We are content to stay in our sin. He pushes us to climb past it. We are happy to stay in our comfortable jobs. He removes them from us and asks us to trust Him. We are happy to settle for less. He knows that we can be and do more. In the words of CS Lewis, "We are far too easily pleased."

     It is hard to trust God when our hearts are broken, our legs are tired, and we just want to stay and rest and be. But God has so much more for us. He loves us too much to let us stay in our sins that will slowly choke us. He loves us too much to let us linger in lukewarm relationship with Him. He loves us too much to give us what we sometimes ask, or even beg for. But the God of the Mountain is with us every step of the way. He doesn't yell at us from above. He walks beside us, quietly encouraging us, being our comfort and strength. We can choose to fight it, and be dragged, kicking and screaming through life. Or we can trust Him, and while we enjoy the views as we climb, we humbly keep following Him. Even when our legs are tired. Even when we don't understand.

                                                   


     Thank you God for the disappointments in my life, that helped me keep going up the mountain, rather than settling for less. Thank you for glimpses of how you view the world.

                                         

                                            "You Don't Have To Move That Mountain"

You don't have to move that mountain
Just help me Lord to climb it
You don't have to move that stumblin' block
Just show me the way around it

We must climb a great high mountain
To reach God's gracious kingdom
But in His words you'll find the strength
If you will just believe them

'Cause you don't have to move that mountain
Just help me Lord to climb it
You don't have to move that stumblin' block
Just show me the way around it

Well, the way is filled with pitfalls
And sometimes we may falter
But you can have His grace, my friend
On your knees down at the altar

'Cause you don't have to move that mountain
Just help me Lord to climb it
You don't have to move that stumblin' block
Just show me the way around it

You don't have to move that mountain
Just help me Lord to climb it
You don't have to move that stumblin' block
Just show me the way around it




Tuesday, March 4, 2014

July by BOY




(A safe place song)

"July" by BOY
Take off your shoes now
You've come a long way
You walked all these miles
And now you're in the right place


This is your party
Everyone came
Everyone's smiling
I'm singing your name



And the nightmares and monsters
Your biggest fears
Seem lightyears away
No, they won't find you here



I'll hold your head my dear
Make sure no one's gonna wake you
Tomorrow you'll still be here
No matter where your dreams will take you



Do you realize
All the falls and flights
All the sleepless nights
All the smiles and sighs
They brought you here
They only brought you home



Put down this suitcase
This weapon of yours
The struggle is over
You don't need it no more
You can't remember longly
You forgot about bored
And nothing's the same
Since you walked through this door



This roof is a blanket
That's keeping you warm
Inside the silence
After the storm



I'll hold your head my dear
Make sure no one's gonna wake you
Tomorrow you'll still be here
No matter where your dreams will take you



And you understand
This never ending dance
This fight, a fading sense
Now it all makes sense
It brought you here
It only brought you
Only brought you
Only brought you
Only brought you home



(And bonus.... a hauntingly lovely acoustic version)